When speaking on the subject of falling in love, a lot of people get overly hung up on age. This is a stigma that needs to be addressed. ‘You’re too young to know what love is’, ‘Too old to start over’ or ‘She’s much older than him; their ages are incompatible’ and vice versa. These are statements we have all heard time and again throughout our lives. Even though most dating experts & psychologist would shake their heads at it, these ideas persist. I can tell you for a fact that age doesn’t have anything to do with falling in love. I know this because when I was just 13 years old, I fell in love with a girl in my class. Her name was Lisa and she took my breath away. She wasn’t the prettiest girl in school or even the most graceful, but something about her got deep into the core of me.
When I spoke about my love for her with the elders in my life –usually after a fit of angst driven self-loathing and depression related to my inability to make her mine—they would say things similar to what I mentioned above, ‘Lighten up. It’s just puppy love’ and ‘You’re far too young to know what real love is’. Now that I am moving on into the middle section of my life, I can look back with years of wisdom on my side and say, I did love that girl. I loved her wholly and fiercely. My parents and other authoritative figures in my life were wrong to diminish what I felt for her.
The timing never quite lined up for Lisa and I. At one point in high school we had a little summer fling, but even though we ‘liked’ each other, we were mostly just friends throughout our remaining years in school –this made the entirety of my adolescence much like a John Hughes movie. So many things in life are all about the timing.
Would it have worked out if we had fully gotten together? Probably not. Pay special attention to the second half of the old saying, ‘Falling in love is easy; staying in love is something special’. I believe this is because it takes us a few tries (sometimes several) before we actually start to figure things out.
You can fall in love at any age. I remember thinking that my parents must be crazy when they split up years ago. I thought, ‘But they’re in their 50’s … how can they start over again?’ It might be an over-simplification of things to say it like this, but they were unhappy and now they are not. It truly was the best thing that they could do. My father even ended up finding his soulmate about a year after the divorce. Now, 15 years later, he and his new wife are just as much in love and are happily riding time’s trolley towards senility together.
You are never too old or too young to have love knock you out of your socks. But with a certain amount of life experience, maintaining that love becomes a little bit easier.
Do you have any related experiences that you'd like to share? If so, please comment below!
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